


To Cleanse Every Memory with Sacred Smoke

by farmgirl428



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: F/M, Hope y'all are cool with that, Or HOT with that, here there be smut, whatever floats your boat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 09:01:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14469324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/farmgirl428/pseuds/farmgirl428
Summary: Cassian has a nightmare. Jyn comforts him. Basically my excuse to write a smutty one shot and get the creative juices flowing.





	To Cleanse Every Memory with Sacred Smoke

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Don't worry, I'm still working on Heartbeats. Let this tide you over in the meantime :) 
> 
> The title comes from "Hasta la Raiz" by Natalia LaFourcade, which is a ridiculously beautiful song that I'm completely obsessed with. This title is from the English translation of the lyrics. :) 
> 
> Also, this has NOT been beta'ed, so plz be gentle with me, I basically wrote this in one sitting! 
> 
> Enjoy!

                _They were both already dead, it was just a matter of when they accepted it._

_“Keep going!” he shouted, every word tinged with the urgency of their mission._

_Even as he looked up and shouted the words, he saw the light behind her, and knew that it was too late. He screamed, but the blaster, fired by the man in white, had already struck Jyn at the base of her skull. Her head fell back at a sickening angle as her fingertips released the crevices in the tower, and he could only shout her name as he watched her fall, her petite body hitting each beam with a sickening crunch on the way down. In that moment, he knew that he had lost. The Rebellion might survive, but Cassian could not survive this. When he said, “Welcome home”, he had lied. He didn’t have a home, all he could offer her was death’s embrace. His redemption died with her. With a quick inhale, he closed his eyes, let go._

_They were already dead. What was the difference?_

He woke with a shake and a gasp, sweat seeping from every pore like the blaster bullets he had taken too many lives with. Next to him, Jyn stirred. Her hand shot out, an unconscious reaction formed from the innumerable nightmares suffered between them. He closed his eyes as her fingertips glided down his shoulder and over his sinewy arms.

            “What happened?” she murmured, voice roughened by sleep and her own nightmares.

            Cassian shook his head. Jyn squeezed his hand, and the pressure there comforted him, grounded him in the moment.

            “We were back on Scarif. This time… we didn’t make it.”

            Jyn acknowledged his admission with a curt nod, another squeeze of the hand. He knew that she had similar dreams of Scarif. They had miraculously survived, rescued by Bodhi seconds before they were swallowed into the destruction wrought by the Death Star. He could still taste the blood in his mouth, feel the sand in his eyes, and his skin tingled at the memory of the flames that surrounded them.

     Cassian was no stranger to near-death encounters. A green recruit had once asked him the most frightened he had ever been, and he had laughed. His sense of fear had fled from his body when he lost his family. The only thing he had left was the Rebel Alliance, and he lived with a quiet assurance that even if he died, ten more would take his place and the Rebellion would survive.

      When Jyn came into his life, her desire to live astounded him. Someone who had lost just as much as him, who had even less to live for than him, wanted to survive. He didn’t want to know her secret- he didn’t want her zeal to infect him. Better to stay cool, indifferent, ready for any mission.

       Nonetheless, her fiery passion thawed him. So, when they kneeled on the beach on Scarif, holding each other tightly, he felt fear. Fear of losing Jyn, and sadness for what they hadn’t gotten to experience together. That pervasive fear had not left him since- still gnawing at his gut and squeezing his heart.

       He stirred from his thoughts with the feeling of Jyn’s lips pressed against his shoulder. As she moved her lips to his neck, he leaned into her touch.

       Nibbling at the shell of his ear, she murmured, “Be here with me, right now.”

       Turning his face to hers, Cassian let her take his bottom lip between her teeth, relishing the quick pain that came when she bit into his lip. Leaning back onto his pillow, he surrendered to her touch, letting out a quiet moan when she scraped her fingernails across his nipples, over the planes of his bare chest. Closing his eyes, he let Jyn take the lead. He savored how she alternated between gentle caresses that soothed, and ministrations just on the edge of painful that thrust him into the moment.

        As her hand slid into his sleep pants, he pulled back. An indignant flash lit in Jyn’s eyes, quickly replaced with delight as Cassian flipped her onto her back. Teasing her with soft kisses to her belly and playful nips at the points of her hips, he slowly tugged the sleep shorts (that once belonged to him) down her thighs. Pressing his mouth to her center, he deeply inhaled the scent of her arousal. As his tongue flicked across her swollen clitoris, he closed his eyes, letting Jyn’s quiet sighs wash away the image of her body falling down the data tower.

          Jyn was never loud in bed- years of guerilla training had broken her of sudden exclamations. But he could sense her pleasure in the way she knotted her fingers tightly into the hair at the base of his scalp. As she clenched her thighs more tightly around his face, he slid a finger into her, gently crooking it to beckon her over the edge. She arched her back at the sensation, and he smoothed his free hand up her abdomen, under the shirt that had yet to be removed. When his fingernails scraped around her nipple, she released a sharp gasp, and when he pressed his tongue more firmly to her clit, she was there, coming against his mouth. Pressing his hand against her hips, he held her still while relishing the sensation of her walls contracting and releasing around his finger. A gentle push to his shoulder told him that Jyn had had enough, and he crawled up the length of her abdomen before pressing a tender kiss to her lips.

       Shimmying out of the confines of his sleep pants, Cassian tugged at the hem of Jyn’s shirt. She quickly complied with his silent request, pulling the shirt over her head. Taking him in hand, Jyn held eye contact as she lined him up with her entrance. Cassian nipped at her jawline when she closed her eyes as he slid into her.

        Cassian relished the feeling of her stubbly calves sliding up and down his thighs, and thrust more quickly as she dug her heels into the flesh of his ass. Suddenly stopping, he groaned with frustration and dropped his head to the pillow as an angry spasm shot down his lower back.

         Running her hands comfortingly along his shoulders, Jyn murmured, “Your back again?” Cassian silently nodded. He was always embarrassed when this happened. He had always prided himself on his endurance and stamina, in and out of the bedroom. But that was before he fell down the data tower. He hated that he couldn’t always be that stronger version of himself with Jyn. A bitter part of him felt that he deserved this, unable to offer better than a subpar performance to the only woman he had ever been in love with.

          He was roused from his thoughts by Jyn tugging at his hair. She smiled up at him, affection shining in her green eyes.

          “Let me do the work,” she purred, pressing loving kisses to the hollow of his throat and his Adam’s apple. “You know I love being on top.”

           Acquiescing, Cassian gingerly rolled over, and immediately felt the relief of lying on his back. Jyn followed, straddling his hips. As she slid down onto his length, he ran a hand up the outside of her thigh. He dug his fingers in a little more tightly as she began to grind down on him, shifting her hips in circles that had him gasping her name. When Jyn leaned forward and pressed her chest to his, he pushed his fingers into her hair, pulling it just hard enough to make her moan with pleasure. In response, she clenched around him, coaxing his hips to thrust up involuntarily.

            Pressing her lips to his ear, she whispered, “I love you.” Cassian pulled her closer, kissed her sloppily. His fingers searched for the apex of her thighs, and when they found their way to her clitoris, he moved them in slow circles across the firm bud. Biting his earlobe, Jyn begged, “More, _please.”_

Applying more pressure with his fingertips, he was rewarded with a soft little cry from Jyn, followed by the rippling force of her orgasm around him. Listening to her mewling cries in his ear combined with her silky heat around his cock was too much, and he found himself following right behind her in orgasm. Bucking up into her, he released a growl from deep within his throat, and gripped her waist tightly. Reminding himself that she was here with him now, they were alive, and that was the most they could want from this moment.

            As the blood rushing in his ears subsided, he listened to the rhythm of Jyn’s quiet pants in his ear. As he drifted off, Jyn sleepily murmured, “I love you.”

            This time, he wasn’t afraid of the fall.


End file.
